The Consequences of Decisions

Part 2 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 4

Part 1

Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn! She was going to be late. REALLY late. She was practically running down the corridors towards the briefing room. She didn’t think that she’d ever been late for a meeting in her life!
 
As she reached the corridor outside the briefing room, she could hear that they were all present. Jonas Quinn, going on about the wonder of bananas, and what good food they made. She wondered where he put all the food he ate, and briefly speculated that it might be a good idea to ask Janet if she was interested in a medical study on the matter.  Daniel, obviously enjoying the conversation with Jonas, despite the early hour and the fact that he'd likely only had two cups of coffee. Daniel just wasn't a morning person.
 
She heard Colonel O'Neill groan as she got closer, and could almost imagine him with his head in his hands at having to sit there and listen to Jonas and Daniel prattle on because the meeting hadn't started on time. He wouldn't be happy about that at all. General Hammond made a quiet remark, obviously talking to the Colonel and trying to distract him before he yelled at Daniel and Jonas to "can it". And as she reached the doorway she saw Teal’c, sitting in his usual reserved manner, but impossible to ignore all the same.
 
As she rushed in and sat down, almost breathlessly, everyone suddenly stopped talking. They all turned to look at her. Damn!
 
“Carter. So good of you to join us. Not keeping you from anything were we?”
 
Sarcasm. Well at least that was normal. “Sorry, Sir. Overslept.”
 
“Overslept?” The expression on the Colonel’s face would have been most amusing had she not been so flustered. “You, Carter?  Overslept?!” She didn’t actually think she’d ever seen eyes goggle quite like that before.
 
“Yes, Sir. Sorry, Sir.” He sat there stunned, his mouth slightly open, obviously struggling to find something more to say, but failing miserably. She was amazed at the complete lack of response on his part. She couldn’t remember the last time Colonel O’Neill had been lost for words.
 
Stepping in over the Colonel’s obvious floundering, General Hammond got things moving. “Now that you’re here, you may proceed Major.”
 
“Sorry Sir?”  She tried to work out what he was getting at.
 
“It’s your briefing Major. You’re presenting information on the upcoming mission to P9A-280?”
 
CRAP!
 
***
 
The briefing had gone well. As well as could be expected anyway, given that she was virtually unprepared. She just needed to get back to her lab and have some time on her own to gather her wits. Of course she wasn’t going to get it.
 
“Sam? Are you okay?”
 
“I’m fine Daniel.”
 
“Are you sure? You were late for the briefing, and then weren’t at all prepared …”
 
“I’m fine Daniel. Really. I just didn’t sleep well, and then slept through my alarm after I finally did get to sleep. That’s all.”
 
“Well, I’m just concerned. It’s so unlike you.”
 
She grinned at him. “Thanks, but I’m really fine. I just need to sit down for a few minutes.”
 
“Well okay then … but let me know if you need anything.”
 
“Sure.” She smiled again.
 
Daniel sauntered out the door in his usual way, apparently concentrating more on what he was going to do next than what he was actually doing. She wondered how he didn’t manage to have more accidents than he did!
 
Fortunately, she had no more interruptions, particularly of the sarcastic nature, and was able to concentrate on preparing for the mission.
 
***
 
The mission was proceeding smoothly. Daniel was off examining some ruins. Jonas, tagging along for this mission although no longer part of SG-1, was assisting him. Teal’c and the Colonel were scouting the area, although there was no evidence of any recent Goa'uld presence. They were just being thorough. And she, Major Samantha Carter, was taking soil samples, and setting up some equipment to observe some astronomical data that the MALP telemetry had reported might be interesting. She’d been starting to set up the equipment when she was surprised by a hand touching her shoulder. She yelped and jumped up, immediately wondering why she had yelled.
 
“Sorry Carter. It’s just me. Didn’t mean to surprise you.”
 
“It’s okay, Sir. I was just thinking. Didn’t realize you were right there.”
 
“Well that much was obvious.” His mouth twitched up at the corner in his trademark grin. “Not been getting enough outdoor skills practice lately? Too much time in that lab of yours?”
 
She couldn’t help but grin. “Apparently so, Sir.”
 
“So what’s the problem Carter?”
 
“Sir?” Why did everyone think that there was something wrong?
 
“Well you haven’t been yourself recently. Now don’t look at me that way! You can’t tell me things are normal when you show up late for a briefing, for the first time I can remember, and aren’t even prepared for it – a briefing that you’re supposed to be giving by the way. And now you’re sitting on a box of equipment instead of unpacking it. What’s going on?”
 
“Nothing, Sir. Really. I’ve just had some things on my mind recently.” She knew him too well to miss the hesitation before he responded.
 
“Wanna talk about it?”
 
“That’s okay, Sir. I’m fine.”
 
“Well you’re part of the team Carter, so if you need to .. um, talk -”
 
She smiled. “I know. Thank you Sir.” The Colonel moved away. She was grateful that he hadn’t pushed the question, even though he really wasn’t one for talking. This wasn’t something she was ready to discuss – especially with him.
 
The remainder of the mission went slowly. She set up her monitoring equipment. Daniel and Jonas found some interesting historical evidence that spoke of Goa’uld occupation at one point, although there was obviously nothing now. They also found some artifacts that they wanted to bring back so they could look at them further. The Colonel and Teal’c managed to occupy themselves by performing a thorough sweep of the area. Nobody had been on this planet in a while.
 
They weren’t staying on the planet overnight, so once everyone was done with their part of the mission, they proceeded back to the Stargate for the trip back to the SGC. While traveling through the Stargate should never be considered easy, it was uneventful.
 
***
 
The next few days passed without incident. She spent her time analyzing the data from the soil samples and the equipment that had been set up on P9A-280. Daniel and Jonas spent time translating the writing on some of the artifacts that they had brought back. She was just starting to think about the weekend when Daniel came in.
 
“Hey Sam.”
 
“Hey,” she said, barely looking up.
 
“How are you doing?”
 
“I’m fine.” She was trying to concentrate on what she was doing so that she could finish and leave.
 
“Really?”
 
“Yes. Really.”
 
“So nothing’s wrong then?” She glanced up. He was looking around the room innocently enough, but she knew him well enough to know that he was feeling her out.
 
“No. Nothing.”
 
“So you’re not dating anyone or anything then?”
 
She couldn’t look him in the eye. “No.”
 
Daniel stopped playing innocent and looked right at her. “You know I could have sworn different.”
 
She was still not looking at him. “Why would you say that?” She tried to sound indignant, but failed because he was right.
 
“Come on Sam. We’ve worked together for over five years. How would I not notice when you were behaving differently? You don’t work anywhere near as late as you used to. I know because when I come round to ask if you’d like coffee you’ve already gone. You’ve been distant the last few weeks, like your mind has been on other things. You’ve always worked really long hours, and now you’re not. Something has definitely changed. And this seems like the only thing that would cause that. So are you going to tell me the truth?”
 
She couldn’t tell him he was wrong. He’d picked up all the clues. And Daniel was like a brother. “Yes. I am.”
 
“Anyone I know?”
 
“No. Just someone I ran into while in a bookstore one day.” Daniel seemed a little disturbed at that. Almost like he’d expected her to say something else. She'd have to ask him about that.
 
“So, is it going well?”
 
“Yes, it is. Things are going very well.”
 
“How long have you been dating?”
 
“A couple of months.”
 
He was surprised. “So, is this serious?”
 
“I *think* it is.” Was that really what she felt? Or was it just what she wanted to feel? She had been enjoying the relationship, spending time outside the SGC and being able to actually express her emotions with someone. But with all the years that she had been forced to repress everything, from Jolinar to the Colonel and others in-between, it was hard to know for sure. She needed time to work things out without anyone being in her face. She needed time to release her emotions from the box that they'd been locked in for so long.
 
She thought she heard a noise in the corridor. Daniel must have heard it too as he looked around towards the door of her lab. But there was silence. She crossed the room to take a look. It was empty. She turned back to Daniel.
 
“Well, um, that’s great Sam. I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks.” She thought for a second. “Can I ask you to keep this between us please?”
 
“Um, sure. I guess. Why?”
 
“Well, I'm really still trying to work things out. I enjoy his company, and I know I like him, but I don't know about the future yet. I need time to be certain. And if anyone finds out I’m be bound to get a lot of questions, and I’d rather avoid that until I'm sure how things stand. Does that make sense?”
 
“Sam, if you want me to keep this between us, then I will. But I think that you’re only going to cause more problems if you wait too long.”
 
“What do you mean by that?” she asked.
 
Daniel squirmed a little. “I just think you should at least tell everyone on the team. We’ve been like a family for a long time. I know that I wasn’t around for a while, but I’m back now and it’s like we’re a family again. I don’t want to lose that.”
 
“I’ll have to think about it. I really don’t want this to get out of hand. Look, it's Thursday. I’ll think about it over the weekend and I’ll let you know what I’m going to do on Monday. Sound good?”
 
“Yeah. Sounds okay I suppose. I'd better get back to working with Jonas. We’ve only got tonight and then we’re going to P5C-731 with SG-7 to investigate a site that might have something to with The Ancients. We should be back Monday or Tuesday. See you then.” He left.
 
“Later.”
 
She felt guilty for not telling everyone. But she didn’t want to have to deal with the looks, the questions, and the aggravation – particularly from the Colonel. While she knew that they had once held feelings for each other, how could she not after they had both confessed them in that embarrassing Za'tarc incident, nothing could come of them. In truth, she wasn't really sure that they were still there. And while she was his second in command, they couldn't even do anything to determine whether that was the case or not. So she did what she had to do, she moved on.  She couldn’t wait forever. She needed a life. To be able to come home to something other than an empty house every night. She needed to be held by someone who could actually express their feelings, not repress them. Why was life always so hard?
 
***
 
Friday passed without event. She worked in her lab, only really leaving to eat. She didn’t see the Colonel at all apart from a brief glimpse of him leaving the Commissary via the other door just as she was coming in around noon. But he didn’t stop by her lab, and he wasn't around the 'gate room when she saw Daniel and Jonas off with SG-7. At the time she thought nothing of this. After all, it wasn’t like he didn’t have other things to do. So she put it aside and concentrated on finishing up so that she could leave at a reasonable hour. She was looking forward to the weekend.
 
***
 
She woke up with a start, mentally dragging herself out of the confused semi-awake state that occurred after being jolted from sleep. She looked at her watch. It was just after 1am on Sunday morning. Then she realized why she was awake – she could hear a phone ringing.
 
Jumping out of bed she went to answer it, but then remembered that this wasn’t her house. She looked over at the form still sleeping on the bed, and after deciding that she’d better answer it anyway, she heard that it was her cell phone that was ringing.
 
Where was it? She ran down the hall and found it in the pocket of her jacket, which was hanging by the door.
 
“Carter.”
 
“Please hold for General Hammond.” A sudden chill went through her body. Why would General Hammond be calling her? Normally it would be the Colonel that called her for any sort of emergency. Why wasn’t it him that was calling her?
 
“Where the hell have you been Major Carter?”
 
She was so shocked she couldn’t respond.
 
“Major Carter? Are you there?”
 
“Yes, Sir,” she finally got out.
 
“We’ve been trying to get hold of you for over 2 hours. We’ve called your home and your cell phone several times. Colonel O’Neill even stopped by your house on the way to the base, but there was nobody there. Where have you been?”
 
“I’m at a friend’s house, Sir.” Guilt churned in her stomach.
 
“Well get back to the SGC immediately. I’ll bring you up to speed when you get here.”
 
“Yes, Sir. I'll be there as soon as I can.” She rang off.
 
She went back to the bedroom. He was still asleep. She grabbed her clothes and quickly dressed in the bathroom. Then went to the kitchen and wrote a note explaining she’d been recalled to the base due to an emergency, and she’d call him as soon as she could. Leaving it on the table, she left, hoping the entire time that whatever had happened wouldn’t be any worse because she hadn’t been there.
 
***
 
On arriving at the SGC, she went immediately to the conference room. General Hammond was waiting.
 
“Major Carter.”
 
“Sir.”
 
“About two and a half hours ago we received a communication from SG-7 saying that they had come across evidence that the Goa’uld had recently been on P5C-731. An hour later they reported that they had encountered several Jaffa near the archaeological site, and they were pulling back to the ‘gate. I sent SG teams one, three, and five through to support their withdrawal. That was an hour and a quarter ago.”
 
The guilt that was already sitting heavily on her intensified. SG-1 was on a mission, and she wasn’t there. She felt sick to her stomach.
 
Suddenly the gate activated.
 
“Off-world activation.” She raced to the control room, General Hammond right behind her.
 
“Sir, it’s definitely from P5C-731, but we are not receiving an IDC,” reported Sergeant Davis.
 
General Hammond grabbed the microphone. “General Hammond to Colonel O’Neill. Do you read me?”
 
There was a short burst of static, then “O’Neill. Go.”
 
“What’s your situation Colonel O’Neill?”
 
“Up to our asses in Jaffa, Sir. Left SG-5 to hold the gate while we retrieved the rest of SG-7. Just ordered them to open the gate to make for the fastest possible withdrawal.”
 
There was something strange about the Colonel’s voice. Something cold, emotionless even.
 
Before General Hammond could respond, he was interrupted by a transmission from Major Garrett, commander of SG-5.
 
“Garrett to O’Neill. We’re taking heavy fire. As soon as we dialed the gate around 20 Jaffa opened fire on us. They must have been setting up an ambush.”
 
“Garrett, this is O'Neill. Hold your position. We’re not far away.” He continued. “Pearce, envelop left. Taylor, you’re with Teal’c and I. Richards, look after the wounded and keep them moving towards the 'gate. Go, go, go!”

Major Pearce was the commander of SG-3. The Colonel was obviously ordering him to take SG-3 in a flank attack on the Jaffa. She tried to think who Taylor was, and then she remembered. He was a member of SG-7, with more military training than the other members of the team. That should have been her! The guilt deepened even further, intensifying when she heard the word ‘wounded’. Captain Richards of SG-7 was looking after wounded people. She hoped to God it was nothing serious.

Hammond made an announcement over the intercom. “Medical emergency in the ‘gate room. Medical teams to the 'gate room.”
 
“Garrett to O’Neill. We can’t hold this position for long. There isn’t much cover here.”
 
“Hold your position Major.”
 
A transmission started then was interrupted by a scream. A new voice spoke.
 
“Lieutenant Franks to O’Neill. Major Garrett is down. We can’t hold out much longer.”
 
“Hold your goddamn position Franks!”
 
The cold cruelty of the Colonel’s voice shocked her. She had never heard him like this.
 
“Yes, Sir.” She could tell that Lt. Franks was near to breaking.
 
Then the radio carried the sound of heavy gunfire and more screams. After what seemed like an eternity, the Colonel’s voice spoke again.
 
“Franks, send your IDC. Get that iris open. We have wounded coming through.”
 
“Receiving SG-5 IDC,” Sergeant Davis reported.
 
General Hammond immediately gave the order. “Open the iris.”
 
After a minute, two figures appeared dragging the body of a third between them. It was Major Garrett.
 
Two more figures appeared, members of SG-7. They were helping Jonas, who appeared to have some sort of leg injury. She ran down to the ‘gate room to help where she could. As she reached the door, Janet arrived along with some medical orderlies and gurneys. Janet started yelling orders for the treatment of the wounded.
 
Captain Richards of SG-7 then appeared with Lieutenant Franks. They were both unwounded. Her concentration on Jonas' injury was interrupted by more radio transmissions.
 
“Pearce to O’Neill. There are about 30 Jaffa approaching from the south. We need to get out of here Sir.”
 
“Understood. Taylor, with me. Teal’c, get Daniel through the ‘gate.”
 
Teal’c appeared carrying Daniel in his arms. Daniel looked to be badly wounded, having taken a staff blast to his right side. She rushed over and grabbed his hand.
 
“Sam!” Daniel sounded delirious.
 
“It’s okay Daniel. You’re back at the SGC now. You’re going to be fine.”
 
Janet rushed over and started treating Daniel.
 
“It’s not okay Sam. He *knows*. Make sure he comes back.” Daniel lost consciousness.
 
Fear drove the guilt in her stomach into her like a blow. She knew what Daniel was saying. But how could he know? She hadn’t told anyone but Daniel. Then she realized. The sound in the corridor. He must have overheard her telling Daniel. Panic started to replace the fear when she heard more radio transmissions.
 
“Pearce to O’Neill. We can’t hold them sir. We have to fall back.”
 
“Get back to the 'gate. I have your six.”
 
Two members of SG-3 appeared through the gate followed by a veritable hail of staff weapon fire. Everyone in the 'gate room ducked as blasts crashed into walls and hit equipment. The blast doors started coming down over the control room.
 
Major Pearce then appeared dragging the last member of SG-3, both men virtually diving through the 'gate, rolling and crashing to a stop on the ramp. More staff blasts followed them, taking a chunk of out Pearce's backpack, and causing everyone in the 'gate room to crouch down as far as they could.
 
Then she heard the transmission that brought her to her knees.
 
“O’Neill to Hammond. Close the iris. Taylor is dead, and there are too many Jaffa between me and the ‘gate. I can’t make it.”
 
The iris swept shut, followed by a series of heavy thuds as it was hit by something from the other side.
 
“Hammond to O’Neill. Hang in there son. We won’t leave you behind.”
 
There was no response, just static. Even that stopped a few seconds later when the ‘gate shut down.
 
She looked around, eyes blurred with tears. Janet was feverishly working on Daniel, concern filling her face. Teal’c looked grim, standing by Daniel but looking back towards the now silent ‘gate. The Colonel was stranded, possibly dead, on an alien planet. SG-1 had virtually ceased to exist. What had she done??

 

Part 2

For one blissful second as he slowly emerged into consciousness, there was peace. Then the pain screamed into his body, filling him with agony. As he struggled with the waves of nausea that threatened to wash over him, he was able to isolate the source to his leg. He had been shot, he remembered dimly, but they had paid with their lives. He raised his head to see where he was, and found himself surrounded by bodies clad in silver armor. He smiled grimly. Anybody who thought Colonel Jack O’Neill, USAF, was an easy target was in for more than a surprise, as these Jaffa had found to their peril.
 
In the distance he heard the horns baying, calling to each other as they tried to isolate his position, and he knew that he must move. Slowly, gasping against dizziness and pain, he rolled onto his side. It was his left leg that was injured, and he thought the leg was broken, possibly in more than one place -- but he had to move. He turned his feelings inward, and sucked the pain into the blackness that now filled his soul. She had chosen another, but somehow this would give him the strength to go on. What was mere physical pain to someone who was already dead emotionally?  The pain suppressed for now, he clawed his way into the bushes.
 
***
 
“Major Carter, you *know* that there is no way I can authorize any sort of rescue attempt at this time." General Hammond was in the briefing room with herself and Janet. "We have to wait until the situation on P5C-731 has changed. We almost lost three SG teams getting SG-7 back, and I don’t want to lose any more people.”
 
She nodded her head, barely able to do even that as she struggled against the guilt and fatigue that was engulfing her. “Yes, Sir. I know, Sir.”
 
“I want him back as much as you do Major, but I won’t throw lives away. We’ll leave it 12 hours and then take a look. In the mean time, you need to get some sleep. You look like you need it.”
 
“Yes, Sir.” He didn’t want the Colonel back as much as she did, nobody could want him back that much. And nobody else had just had a huge chunk of their heart ripped out and shredded before their eyes. It was only her. And what made it worse is that she was the one who done the shredding.
 
“Major?”
 
“Yes, Sir?”
 
“I’m not giving up on him. That’s a promise. Now, get some rest.” He turned and headed towards his office.
 
“Sam?” It was Janet. “Are you going to be okay?”
 
Ignoring Janet's question, she asked, “How’s Daniel? I need to stay with him.”
 
“No Sam, you don’t. Teal’c is with Daniel. You know that he won’t leave his side. Why don't you try and get some rest like the General suggested?”
 
“I’m fine Janet, really.”
 
“Sam Carter, I’m your doctor. I know very well how you are, and I know that when you say you’re fine, you’re probably not. Go and lie down for a few hours. There’s nothing any of us can do now except wait, and your not sleeping isn’t going to change that. Look Sam, I know that this is hard on you, but I really think you need to get some rest. Do you need me to give you something?”
 
“No thanks. I’m fine.” She dragged herself to her feet, and somehow made her way to the quarters she used when staying on-base. She collapsed onto her bed, immediately slipping into a sleep that, while necessary, was tormented; tormented with images of the Colonel calling to her for help, only for her to turn her back on him and walk away.
 
***
 
Someone was calling her name, and she wasn’t sure if it was real or a dream. Although, if it were a dream, they were doing a good job of shaking her shoulder.
 
“Major Carter?” It was Teal’c. She opened her eyes and struggled to blink away the grit that seemed to fill them.
 
“Teal’c?”
 
“Major Carter. Daniel Jackson has regained consciousness. I believed that you would like to see him.”
 
“Thanks Teal’c. That was quick. How long have I been asleep?”
 
“Approximately ten hours.”
 
“What?!” How could she have slept so long? She felt panic rising in her chest as she struggled to sit up.
 
“There is no reason for concern. General Hammond is yet to authorize a reconnaissance of P5C-731, and Doctor Frasier insisted that you sleep. We have time.”
 
Feeling only slightly reassured, she decided that she needed to try and wake herself up.
 
“Okay. I’m just going to freshen up before I come down and see Daniel.”
 
“Indeed. I will advise him of your actions.” Teal’c left, leaving the room as silently as he had obviously entered.
 
She ran her hands through her hair. She felt exhausted, and hoped that a shower and some coffee would help.
 
***
 
As she entered the infirmary, feeling only slightly more awake than before, she saw Daniel being fussed over by Janet. Ever since his return from ascension, Janet had been paying special attention to him, and she wondered whether here was something going on between them, or if Janet just wanted to ensure that she didn’t lose him again as a patient. Regardless, he certainly seemed to be getting her undivided care.
 
“Hey Janet, Daniel. How’s the patient?” She tried to sound perkier than she felt.
 
Janet looked up. “Well, there were no serious internal injuries, but a staff weapon can cause significant trauma from the force of the blast. This resulted in two fractured ribs, as well as a fractured hip. I’m afraid that he isn’t going to be doing much of anything for a while.”
 
She looked at Daniel. He complexion seemed somewhat pallid, almost gray in places. He was obviously in pain.
 
He looked up at her. “Sam, we need to talk.”
 
Before she could respond, Janet interrupted. “Daniel, you need to get some sleep. Sam can come back later.”
 
“No. We need to talk now. Please?”
 
“Okay. Just for a few minutes. Then you have to get some more rest.”
 
“Yes, Doctor.” Janet moved away, although only to the other side of the room, and started doing some paperwork.
 
“What happened, Daniel?” she said as she sat down beside the bed.
 
“Do you mean with the mission, or with Jack?”
 
“You know what I mean.” Although she needed to know, she wasn’t sure that she really wanted to hear his answer.
 
“It was as though he was dead inside, Sam. I haven’t seen him like that since the first Abydos mission, right after, well, you know.” He paused. “Anyway, there were no jokes, no sarcastic remarks. Nothing. The only thing left was the soldier.”
 
While Daniel was talking, she felt as though her heart was being torn in two. She realized then how stupid she had been to even think that she could love anyone other than the Colonel, than Jack. He had said that he would be willing to die rather than lose her, and all she had done was pretended her feelings weren’t there, eventually turning her back on him in his time of need. And now he could be dead, and she might never be able to tell him how much he really meant to her. How had she not seen this sooner? She put her head in her hands and started to cry, tears running down her face while her shoulders shook silently, even now subconsciously suppressing any noise so as not to make a scene.
 
“Sam. It’s okay Sam.” She felt Daniel’s hand stroking her head, trying to comfort her despite his own pain. “He’s not dead. You know Jack. I’m sure we’ll find him.”
 
She nodded vaguely, tears still streaming down her face. “I abandoned him Daniel. He’s out there thinking I don’t care. And if he’s dead, he’ll never know that I do.”
 
“Do you, Sam? Do you care?”
 
She nodded again, unable to find the strength for any words.
 
“We’ll find him Sam. You’ll find him. I know you will.” Although she could tell Daniel meant what he said, his words were of little comfort, but giving up was not what she was, and so she would try. She would do everything that she could. She brought her tears under control just as Janet came back over to where she was sitting.
 
“I think that’s enough for now, Sam. Daniel needs to get some rest. You can talk more later.”
 
She got up. “I’m going to go and see what the General is planning. I’ll stop by after that, okay? You get some rest.”
 
“Bye, Sam.” He was already drifting off to sleep. Janet checked his medications and straightened the sheets a little.
 
“Don’t worry Sam. Daniel’s going to be okay. You concentrate on getting the Colonel back.”
 
“I will Janet.” She straightened her shoulders, attempted to reign in her emotions, although they seemed to have a mind of their own, and set off to find General Hammond.
 
***
 
She found him in the briefing room.
 
“Major Carter, I was just about to send someone to find you. I’d like you to analyze the data from the MALP. Lead the way.”
 
She practically ran down the stairs to the control room, drawing the attention of several of the airmen on duty. She didn’t care. Teal’c was already there, somehow knowing that this was the appropriate time.
 
“Sergeant Davis, dial up P5C-731 please.”
 
“Yes, Ma’am.”
 
She waited impatiently as the gate dialed the co-ordinates, tapping her fingers on the console as Davis called out each chevron as it locked. Finally the ‘gate opened.
 
“Checking for MALP telemetry now, Sir,” she said, immediately bringing up the appropriate software on the screen. “No response. Looks like the original MALP has been destroyed. I guess that was to be expected, Sir.”
 
“In that case we should launch a UAV, Major. It’s less likely to be destroyed immediately should there be any hostiles near the ‘gate.”
 
“Beginning UAV launch checklist,” said Sergeant Davis. After a few minutes of systems checks, the UAV was ready to go. “Launching UAV now.”
 
The wait while the UAV traveled through the wormhole seemed excruciating.
 
“Receiving UAV telemetry General,” she reported. Everyone in the room turned to look at the video screens. “It appears that there is nothing in the immediate vicinity of the gate. You can just make out the destroyed MALP. Unfortunately we won’t be able to salvage that one, Sir. Now beginning search pattern.”
 
She was rattling off the technical details as a distraction from what was going on inside her. She had to concentrate on what she was doing. She had to find the Colonel. She couldn’t allow her emotions about him to get in the way. He needed her, and she would be there, no matter what!
 
As the UAV ran a search pattern that spread slowly away from the ‘gate area, the signs of the fight that had occurred 12 hours previously were obvious. Several Jaffa bodies were sprawled in an area part way between the ‘gate and the ruins. These had obviously been the ones attacking SG-5. Several more bodies were obvious near the ruins, probably those that had been attacking SG-7. South of the ‘gate area were more bodies, strung out along the path they had followed whilst attacking the retreating members of SG-3.
 
Suddenly she saw a group of bodies gathered around a small rise near the tree line, around a quarter of a mile from the gate. She also saw what appeared to be a body dressed in BDUs. It was difficult to tell from the small image, but she was certain that it wasn’t the Colonel. She would recognize him anywhere. She guessed that it must be Lieutenant Taylor from SG-7.
 
“I think that must be Lieutenant Taylor, Sir,” she advised General Hammond.
 
Captain Richards responded, having been called to the control room when the reconnaissance began. “Yes. That looks like Taylor.” His voice was soft, struggling with the difficulty of losing a member of his unit. Unfortunately, there was little time for anyone to provide comfort.
 
“Continue the search pattern, Major.” General Hammond’s order was unnecessary, as she had already begun doing exactly that.
 
There was no immediate sign of a second body, which lifted her spirits somewhat, but there was still no sign of where the Colonel might be. As the UAV continued the search pattern, the external microphones started to pick up the sound of Jaffa horns. She and Teal’c looked at each other, immediately knowing what that meant. Teal’c spoke first.
 
“General Hammond. The sound of the horns means that the Jaffa are in pursuit of someone. This means O’Neill is likely alive, and has eluded capture.”
 
“Major, has the UAV provided any information on what forces the Goa’uld have on the planet?”
 
“Not yet, Sir. We’re still haven't actually seen any Jaffa.”
 
“Major, try contacting Colonel O’Neill by radio.” She was reaching to do this when she was interrupted by Teal’c.
 
“I would advise against that General Hammond. If O’Neill is hiding from Jaffa search parties, the sound of his radio may reveal his position.” Why hadn’t she thought of that? “The best approach would be to send forces through the Stargate to locate and extract him. I will volunteer for this task.”
 
“I know you will Teal’c, but I’m not sending anyone until we have a better idea of what we’re facing. I don’t want to risk any lives unnecessarily, even for Colonel O’Neill.”
 
Her heart sank a little, but she knew that the General was right. If they rushed through the gate they could be walking right into a trap, no matter that the UAV had reported no Jaffa in the immediate vicinity of the ‘gate itself. She tried to maneuver the UAV in an effort to determine where the Jaffa were searching, whilst at the same time keeping it high enough that it wouldn’t be immediately obvious to anyone on the ground.
 
“General,” Sergeant Davis reported, “we only have fifteen minutes before the ‘gate will automatically disconnect.”
 
Five more minutes crawled past without any sign of the Jaffa being revealed, although the sound of the horns was definitely closer to the microphone pickup of the UAV.
 
Finally the UAV cleared a small ridge around half a mile south of the gate and they could see the Jaffa. There were around twenty, in two groups, and seemed to be very slowly searching an area that was full of trees and bushes. It was obvious that they were looking for someone who was hiding. She had no doubts who that was, and she had to save him.
 
“Sir, they’re obviously looking for Colonel O’Neill. We have to go through and find him before he’s discovered.”
 
“I know, Major. Have SG units one, three, six, and nineteen standing by in the ‘gate room in 10 minutes.”
 
***
 
Nine minutes later, she was fully equipped and was waiting anxiously with Teal’c and the twelve members of the other SG teams for General Hammond to order the ‘gate opened and the mission to proceed. He came through the door just as the ‘gate started dialing out.
 
“Major Carter, as the ranking officer in SG-1, you have command of this force. Your mission is to rescue Colonel O’Neill. Bring him home.” He stepped closer to her and saluted. “Good luck Major.”
 
“Yes, Sir.” She returned his salute just as the ‘gate completed the dialing sequence.
 
“UAV telemetry re-established,” reported Sergeant Davis. “The ‘gate area is still free of hostile forces.”
 
She stepped up onto the ramp, and addressed the group. “Okay, let's move out!” She then turned and led them through the Stargate, hoping desperately that they would be able to find the Colonel before it was too late.
 
***
 
“Captain Peters, SG-19 will secure the ‘gate area. Make sure that you’re prepared to offer fire support if and when necessary. Set up the radio signal booster so that we have clear communications back to the SGC”
 
“Yes, Ma’am.” SG-19 immediately started unpacking and setting up their equipment.
 
“Major Weir, I want SG-6 to proceed to the ridge we observed and secure Lieutenant Taylor’s body. Then be available for support as necessary.”
 
“Yes, Ma’am.”
 
“Major Pearce, SG-3 is with me. We’re going to find Colonel O’Neill.”
 
“Yes, Ma’am.”
 
With Teal’c in the lead, they started moving swiftly but quietly towards the position the UAV had shown as the search area for the Jaffa.
 
As they approached the area in question, she could hear the Jaffa horns calling to each other. Thankfully, it seemed that the Colonel had not yet been found. She breathed a small sigh of relief. He was going to be okay after all. She signaled Major Pearce to slow down the approach.
 
There wasn’t much cover where they were located, but the ridge was blocking their direct line of site from the area the Jaffa were searching. She signed that Teal’c should approach the ridge line with her to see if they could see anything. They both crawled the last few feet on their stomachs, making sure that they did not give away their presence.
 
From her position at the top of the ridge, she could see the two Jaffa search parties. They were beginning to get fairly close together. She needed to draw their attention away from the search. She turned and signaled to Major Pearce that SG-3 should move down the ridge line a few hundred feet. With the four members of SG-3 plus herself and Teal’c, they should be able to take out one of the search groups fairly readily. The question was, which one?
 
After another couple of minutes Major Pearce was in position. She ordered that he engage the group of Jaffa closer to the ridge. They opened fire, taking down five of the ten Jaffa in the first volley. The Jaffa were disoriented, unable to determine where the attack had originated. This allowed three more Jaffa to be taken out in quick succession. The remaining two managed to get into cover. Unfortunately, the Jaffa were now aware of their presence, as she discovered to her horror when around thirty broke cover from the left flank and moved rapidly towards her position.
 
“Captain Peters, we need that fire support now. SG-3 will direct your fire.” She mentally thanked the General for deciding that the SGC needed a heavy weapons unit, and for sending them along on this mission. SG-19’s Marines were equipped with a M224 60mm mortar.
 
“Pearce to Peters, do you have a mark on our position?”
 
“Mark fixed and correct.”
 
“From our position, left 600. One round.”
 
She heard the mortar shell approaching, and it detonated just short of the advancing Jaffa.
 
“Carter to Weir. Advance and get behind those Jaffa. I want them in a crossfire.”
 
“Understood Major Carter. Moving now.”

Major Pearce was still directing the fire of SG-19.
 
“Up 50. Up 50.  Up 50. One round!”
 
The next mortar shell exploded in the midst of the Jaffa.
 
“Fire for effect! Fire for effect!”
 
The fire from the mortar, combined with that from SG-3 and SG-6, eliminated the Jaffa threat quickly.
 
“Stop! Stop! Stop! Cease fire, SG-19. Cease fire. Target neutralized.”
 
“Carter to Weir. Advance to our positions, and support our move across the ridge.”
 
“Weir to Carter. Understood.”
 
“Carter to Pearce. Move across the ridge and engage the Jaffa still searching for Colonel O’Neill.”
 
“Pearce to Carter. Understood.” She saw SG-3 crossing the ridge and moving down the slope towards the wooded area where they believed the Colonel to be located.
 
She turned to Teal’c. “Let’s go find the Colonel.”
 
They both crossed the ridge cautiously. There were still at least a dozen Jaffa unaccounted for. Sporadic firing broke out to her right as Major Pearce and SG-3 ran into some of them.
 
“Carter to Weir. Are you in a position to support SG-3?”
 
“Weir to Carter. Almost there.” He was obviously running.
 
She continued moving towards the trees, but was forced to take cover when a staff blast slammed into the ground next to her. She returned fire, but was unable to clearly see who had fired upon her.
 
From out of the corner of her eye she saw two Jaffa dragging a body away from the fight. It was the Colonel! They seemed to be taking him towards a clearing. Attracting Teal’c’s attention, she alerted him to what was happening using hand signals. Taking care to remain under cover, she cautiously started to follow the Jaffa, hoping she would get a chance to take a shot.
 
Teal’c’s covering fire allowed her to get close enough to the clearing to be able to see the two Jaffa clearly. They were obviously waiting for something. She tried to see if the Colonel was okay, but all she could determine was that he was slumped on the ground. Whether he was conscious or not was impossible to know. She took aim on the first of the Jaffa. Just as she fired, all three figures were surrounded by the rings of a Goa'uld transporter, and they disappeared. Her heart stopped. Where had they come from? Then she realized that the Jaffa must have been waiting for a cloaked Tel’tac, which had just picked them up.
 
Her emotions overwhelmed her, and she didn’t even hear that the firing had stopped until Teal’c spoke to her.
 
“Major Carter? Where is O’Neill?”
 
She tried to speak, but finding that the words died in her throat, she simply turned and clung to him.
 
“Major Carter?” She could hear the surprise in his voice.
 
She tried to swallow, even though her throat had dried completely, and looked up at him. “He’s gone Teal’c!”  She could no longer stop the tears.
 
***
 
He woke slowly, surrounded by a harsh white light, and wondered if he had died. Then he heard the grinding noise, and a voice spoke.
 
“Take him to Lord Ba'al.”
 
His mind started screaming.

 

Part 3
 

“What happened, Major Carter?” She looked across the briefing room table at General Hammond. She knew he wanted a complete explanation, which was why he had called herself, Major Pearce, Major Weir, Captain Peters, and Teal’c together.

“Upon arrival at P5C-731, Sir, I ordered SG-19 to secure the ‘gate area, and SG-6 to locate Lieutenant Taylor’s body. SG-3 came with Teal’c and myself to find Colonel O’Neill.” So far, she had been able to keep her emotions in check. After breaking down on Teal’c’s shoulder while off-world, it had only been the approach of Major Pearce that had given her the push necessary to resume the military façade. At the moment she was keeping that façade intact, but she wasn’t sure how much longer she could last.

“After reaching the area near where we believed Colonel O’Neill to be located, we engaged the Jaffa who were searching that area. This alerted a second group of Jaffa to our presence, and we required the support of SG-6 and SG-19 to eliminate the threat. However, at some point during the fire fight, the Jaffa who had been searching for Colonel O’Neill were able to locate him, and by the time we were able to continue our own search, Colonel O’Neill had been captured. I was able to follow the two Jaffa who were escorting Colonel O’Neill to a small clearing, but before I could do anything to stop them, they were ringed out.”

Her eyes misted as she remembered the moment when she had seen them disappear, powerless in her inability to do anything. She had been so close, but might as well have been a million miles away. The guilt threatened to engulf her. If it had been the Colonel commanding the rescue force, she knew that he would not have failed.

“Major Carter?” She didn’t realize how much she had drifted until General Hammond drew her attention back to the debriefing.

“Sir?”

“Was there any indication of how they ringed out, Major?”

“They must have transported to a cloaked Tel’tac, Sir, because rings only have a short range and we didn’t see any other Goa’uld ships.” If only she had been faster, he would be here now.

“Do we know which Goa’uld these Jaffa served?”

Teal’c responded quickly. “Yes General Hammond. They were in the service of the System Lord Ba’al.”

She looked at Teal’c, horrified. It was bad enough that the Colonel was captured, but she hadn’t even considered who had captured him. After losing the Colonel, it had been all she could to do keep her emotions in check and get the four SG units back to the SGC. But captured by Ba’al? This was her worst nightmare! While he had not spoken willingly about his previous experiences after being blended with Kanan, she knew that he had been tortured to death several times, and each time revived in a sarcophagus. She didn’t even want to think about what might happen this time. She *couldn’t* think about it.

General Hammond finally asked the question that her mind was refusing to consider. “Do we have any idea about where he may have been taken?”

There was silence in the room. She tried to speak, but found that she could not. Once again, Teal’c answered the question, giving her time to attempt to compose herself.

“We do not, General Hammond. Ba’al’s rule extends over many systems, and O’Neill could have been taken to any of these. He may also be imprisoned on a mothership.”

General Hammond considered this for a moment, then directed his gaze towards Teal’c. “We should contact the Tok’ra to see if they have any operatives who may be able to provide information on his location. Master Bra’tac may also be able to assist if any members of the Free Jaffa movement have information on where Ba’al may be located.”

“I will contact them immediately,” replied Teal’c.

“Thank you Teal’c. Unfortunately, there is one other thing that I need to do. As of this moment I am declaring Colonel O’Neill missing in action.”

Missing in action? He was gone, not only from Earth, but possibly forever. She had failed him; failed him in a way that he had never failed her.

“General Hammond, we cannot give up on O’Neill.” She could hear the trace of anguish in Teal’c’s voice as he spoke.

“I’m not giving up, Teal’c. But until we have more information on his whereabouts, there is nothing we can do. Contact the Tok’ra and Master Bra’tac. See what assistance they can provide. Dismissed.”

***

“Colonel O’Neill, we meet again.” The voice was deep, even for a Goa’uld. And while he sometimes had difficulty distinguishing between those voices, this was one he remembered; one that he would never forget; one that haunted his worst nightmares.

“What do you want Ba’al? I didn’t tell you anything before, and I won’t tell you anything now.”

“I do not want you to tell me anything, Colonel O’Neill.”

“Then why am I here?”

“You are here because you have not only cost me a fortress, but also my most trusted servant, my Lotar. This time, I want no information from you. This time, Colonel O’Neill, you are here purely for my pleasure.”

***

She was sitting in her lab with Jonas and Teal’c, trying to come up with some information on where Ba’al might be located. It had been the same for the last two days, and she was experiencing a significant sense of déjà vu regarding the whole situation. It was just like when the Colonel had been held prisoner by Ba’al before, including the fact that despite knowing which Goa’uld he had been captured by, they still had no idea of his whereabouts.

She rubbed her eyes, feeling extremely tired. She had barely slept since coming back from P5C-731. It was impossible to sleep while the Colonel was missing, especially since sleep only brought nightmares about what horrors he might be suffering at Ba’al’s hands. So she kept looking, and tried to hold onto the hope that they would be able to bring the Colonel back safely.

At least this time the Tok’ra had been forthcoming with information. Her father had been very concerned for the Colonel, still feeling like the Tok’ra had to make amends for the terrible experience that had been Kanan, and was doing everything he could to help.

“Major Carter. There is little new information here. The System Lords are concerned because of what Anubis was able to achieve in the battle above Abydos. It will not be easy to find information on their current activities.”

“I know, Teal’c, but we have to keep trying. We have to find something. You know what Ba’al did to the Colonel last time. We can’t let that happen again!”

“Sam,” Jonas looked up from studying the printouts he was holding. “We’re trying, but we’ve been over these reports at least three times. We need to take a break, and I’m hungry. Want to join us?”

“No, that’s okay, Jonas, I’m not hungry. But I think I’ll swing by and check on Daniel, see how he’s doing.”

“Okay, but you know where to find us if you change your mind.”

***

“How’s the patient, Janet?”

She found Daniel in the infirmary with Janet fussing over him. He did look a little better, not quite so obviously in pain. However, his recovery was going to be fairly extended, possibly several months.

“He’s doing well, Sam. Fortunately he doesn’t appear to need any additional surgery, so that should shorten his recovery time a little, although it all depends on how much he listens to his Doctor’s advice!” Janet gave Daniel a look, which he returned sheepishly, before turning, “And how are you doing, Sam? You look very tired. Have you been getting enough sleep?”

“I’m fine, Janet. We’ve been going over the information that the Tok’ra provided, but there’s very little to find.”

“You need to make sure that you get enough sleep, Sam. You won’t do anybody any good if you collapse from exhaustion.”

“I’ll be fine. I just need to sit down for a few minutes.”

“Okay, why don’t you sit down and talk with Daniel while I go and get some lunch.” Janet turned and headed for the door.

“So, Daniel, how do you feel?” she said, slumping into the chair beside Daniel’s bed.

“Sore. What do you expect?”

She chuckled a little. “Not much else I suppose. You’ve almost got enough broken bones this time to rival one of the Colonel’s injuries.” Suddenly realising that she was making a joke at the Colonel’s expense, she stopped laughing. Tears started to form in her eyes, but she blinked them back before they were obvious.

“It’s okay, Sam. You’re doing your best to find him.”

“But we’re not getting anywhere, Daniel. Two days, and not a single piece of useful information!”

“Have you slept at all? Been home?”

“I’ve slept. Just here on base though, going home would waste too much time.”

“What about your boyfriend? Have you called him to let him know what’s happening?”

“Huh?” She looked up at him, startled.

“Your boyfriend, Sam, have you called him?”

“Um, no. I guess I’ve forgotten in all that’s been going on.”

“Forgotten? Just a few days ago he you were saying that the relationship could be serious. How could you have forgotten?”

She sat there dumbfounded, having no idea how to answer the question. She had been absolutely honest when she said that she had forgotten about calling him. She had been so concerned about her search for Ba’al, that nothing else had mattered. And when she examined her feelings properly, she knew why. The most important thing to her was the Colonel, … was Jack, and nothing else could ever be more important than him. She realized that now, and could not understand how she had ever believed otherwise. Then guilt set in again, guilt that turning her back on … Jack, had caused him to be captured by Ba’al -- guilt that she had used another man to try to escape her feelings. She wasn’t sure how she could cope, what she could do.

“Sam?”

She was so consumed with her emotions, she hadn’t realized that she had just been sitting there for several minutes, staring into space. “I’ve been busy.”

“You’ve been busy?”

“Yes. What’s your point?”

“Hey, take it easy. I’m just trying to talk to you here, Sam. There’s no need to be defensive.” He was right. She was taking it out on him.

“I’m sorry, Daniel. The last few days have just been really tough.”

“I know Sam, I know. But I still don’t understand. How could you have forgotten your boyfriend?”

“I didn't forget him, I just forgot. . . about him. . . What's the big deal?”

“Relax Sam, I’m only trying to help.” He sighed. “Is it because you’ve finally realized that Jack is more important to you?”

She looked up, stunned. How had Daniel known? She only had only barely begun to understand herself the true nature of her repressed feelings.

“How could I not know, Sam?” Daniel said, almost as though he was reading her mind. “I’ve seen the way you look at each other, the little glances and smiles you exchange when you don’t think anyone else is watching. We spend virtually all our waking moments together, as well as many of our sleeping ones. It’s impossible not to see.”

As Daniel spoke, her heart pounded with hope as she understood that the moments that she had experienced were not one sided, but then he continued.

“That’s why I was so surprised when you said that you were dating someone else, and why I was so concerned that you should tell us. I saw what Jack went through after he lost Charlie. He took that first mission to Abydos as a suicide mission. He never expected to come back alive, and I’m not even sure that he wanted to. He was dead emotionally, Sam, and when I saw him on P5C-731, I knew he was starting to go the same way. I could see it in his eyes. They were flat, almost lifeless; but there was no time to speak to him as the Jaffa attacked almost immediately, and then I was injured.”

She shook her head with despair, as she realized the crushing impact of her decisions on the man she loved. Loved? Could she admit that now, to herself? And would she ever be able to admit it to him?

“I wanted to tell him, especially after everything that we’ve been through together, but it was so hard, and I wasn’t even sure how he felt any more. We’ve both repressed so much; I didn’t even know what was real.” Tears filled her throat and her eyes, blurring her vision, and she leaned forward and grasped the edge of Daniel’s bed and bowed her head over it, letting the tears flow unchecked.

She vaguely felt Daniel rubbing her back. “It’s not your fault, Sam.”

“It is, Daniel, you don’t understand. He overheard us talking in my lab the night before you left for P5C-731. He was like that because he thought he had lost me; but I love him, Daniel, I’ll always love him, more than life itself -- and now I’ve killed him.”


***

She had finally made it back to her lab, and used the brief time alone to try and compose herself while she thought about her options.

She looked at the phone on the wall, and knew that she should check her messages, knew that he would have called and would be looking for an explanation. She wasn’t sure that she could face even his voice, but she steeled herself as she knew that the sooner she did this, the sooner it would be over, so she reached for the phone and started dialing.

He had left four messages, the first on Sunday morning, obviously after he had woken up and found her note and he didn’t sound too anxious. She had been called away before, although not in the middle of the night. The next call was Monday morning, and she could hear a trace of concern, wondering where she was and why she hadn’t called him. There was another call on Monday night, and sounded a lot more concerned, asking her to call him back as soon as she could. The last call was this morning, and he was starting to sound a little desperate, scared even, that something might have happened to her, as it had been three days since she had simply disappeared from his house.

She knew that she had to call him, but had no idea where to start or what to say. She had learned in the past three days that she had been using him in an effort to escape her feelings, and to find a small amount of comfort that she couldn’t get from the man she truly loved. But he deserved a phone call, letting him know that she was okay, even if she had no intention of ever seeing him again. Given her current state she couldn’t face talking to him, so she decided to leave him a message, and as now was as good a time as any, she picked up the phone and started dialing.

“Hi, it’s Sam. Sorry I haven’t called, but something pretty serious has come up and I’m going to be at the base for a while, certainly a few more days, possibly weeks. Don’t worry about calling as I won’t be able to pick up any messages. Bye.”

It wasn’t really a ‘Dear John’ message, but she simply didn’t have the strength to do something like that. She felt sick to her stomach that she had left him hanging, but all her energy had to be devoted to finding Jack, and somehow saving him from whatever Ba’al had planned. Even so, she felt as though the phone call had drained the last of her energy, and the guilt began to wash over her again; guilt for leaving Jack to be captured; guilt at abandoning him for another man; guilt for using that man to hide from her feelings. There was so much guilt that it was crushing her, and as she struggled to find a way to continue, the very feelings she had repressed for so long somehow shined a light through the darkness that was burdening her, providing her with the very thing she needed more than anything; a cause to commit herself to, and hope that she would be successful.

***

“Major Carter, we have covered these Tok’ra reports already. No new information will be found in them.” It was later in the afternoon, and Teal’c and Jonas were in the Briefing Room continuing their review of the information the Tok’ra had provided.

“Teal’c’s right, Sam. We’ve been over these before, and there’s nothing we can use.”

“I know guys, but we have to keep looking. We can’t just give up. There has to be something here somewhere.” She was about to continue when the alarm went off for an unscheduled ‘gate activation. She looked at Teal’c, and they immediately dropped what they were doing and headed for the stairs, Jonas hobbling along behind them.

They reached the Control Room as the dialing sequence completed.

“Receiving Tok’ra IDC.”

Looking around, she saw that she was the senior officer present, so she ordered that the iris be opened. She then turned and headed down the stairs to the ‘gate room, followed by Teal’c. As the door slid open, she saw a familiar figure emerge at the top of the ramp, her father.

“Dad!”

“Hey, Sam.”

He came down the ramp, but refrained from his usual hug. She was immediately concerned, looking into her father’s face to see if she could determine a reason for his behavior. He looked tired, his eyes downcast, as though it was an effort to stay awake. Her pulse quickened as she immediately feared the worst.

“We need to talk.”

***

The cell that he was in had no anti-grav technology, but his confinement was just as effective. Even if he had contemplated escape, his body would not have allowed him to do so; he simply hadn’t the energy, and just sitting against the wall took almost all his strength. Three times so far he had woken in a sarcophagus. It was somehow worse this time as he knew what to expect, at least in some ways. Ba’al had resorted to more traditional means of torture, and his clothes had the rents and holes to show just how effective that torture had been. But there was no pain, even in his knee that had always caused problems; the sarcophagus more than effectively repaired the body. The mind was a different story.

Last time, Daniel had been there, and while he had done nothing to physically intervene in any way, the simple fact of his presence had made the periods between torture more bearable. This time, he was completely alone. Even the Jaffa guarding the cells remained beyond his hearing, ensuring complete silence; a silence that ate into his mind, slowly eroding his sanity more effectively than any pain. And this time, the one constant that he could have held onto, the center of his world for the past five years, was missing, because he knew that she no longer loved him.

***

Her father started the discussion by addressing General Hammond. “We think that we’ve found Ba’al.”

“Isn’t that good news Jacob?”

“Not exactly, George. The planet where we think Ba’al is located is not in the ‘gate network, so the only means of access is by ship. One of our operatives, who was positioned within Ba’al’s forces, managed to get aboard an Ha’tak that was carrying supplies and construction materials. He was able to communicate the destination back to the Tok’ra.”

“Was he able to provide any information on whether the Colonel was alive, Dad?”

“No, he wasn’t. In fact we haven’t heard from him since he communicated the planet’s location, so we’re assuming the worst.”

“So where does this leave us, Jacob?”

“All the System Lords are currently lying low and rebuilding their forces. Anubis hasn’t exactly been pressing the attack, but he’s certainly not letting any opportunities slip away from him. Probably the only way to get to Ba’al, would be to offer him some sort of information that he couldn’t get on his own.”

“What sort of information are you suggesting?” said General Hammond.

“Probably the best information we could provide would be something like a planet that is rich in resources that he would be able to use to consolidate his strength – naquada for example. Something that would be beyond the immediate reach of Anubis.”

She turned to General Hammond. “Sir, there are plenty of planets that we have surveyed which have large naquada deposits, and no native population. I’m sure that we could find one which would suit these purposes.”

“How long would it take you to find an appropriate planet, Major?”

“No more than an hour.” Her hope was finally starting to shine, just a little, when her father interrupted.

“It’s not just a matter of finding a planet, George. We also need to somehow communicate that information to Ba’al. We can’t just call him up and pass the information along. Someone actually has to go to the planet and propose an alliance with Ba’al in return for the information, someone that Ba’al isn’t likely to simply execute out of hand.”

“What do you mean by that, Jacob.”

“The only person who could perform the task would be a Goa’uld, someone who is looking to Ba’al for protection, and can offer this as information in return.”

“Don’t you have any operatives that would be able to do this?”

“After the reverses of the past two years, the Tok’ra are simply stretched too thin. All our available operatives are already committed.”

“So what are you asking for, Jacob?”

“Whoever goes to Ba’al would need to blend with a symbiote in order that they could impersonate a Goa’uld.”

“You’re asking that one of my people become a Tok’ra?”

“Not forever. As soon as a suitable new host was located, the symbiote would leave. It would not be a permanent blending.”

“Jacob, you know that I can’t ask that of anyone here. We don’t even know if Colonel O’Neill is alive, and for all you know, this could be a suicide mission.”

“I know that George, but as far as the Tok’ra can determine, it’s the only way.” He nodded his head slightly as he passed control to Selmak. “General Hammond, Jacob Carter is correct. The only way to reach Ba’al is to provide him with information he needs, and in the process infiltrate someone into his ranks that can search for Colonel O’Neill. There is no other way.” He nodded his head again as Selmak released her control. “We only wish there was, George. We only wish there was.”

The room was silent for a moment, as they all considered the next step. The glimmer of hope that had appeared was now dimmed. It seemed highly unlikely that General Hammond would even countenance asking a member of the SGC to take this mission on. There was too much at risk, too little chance of success. They would never find Jack, and she would never see him again. The sorrow of that thought sank into her inner core, and she fought the tears that she knew would come. She would never see Jack again, unless …

“I’ll do it.”
 

Part 4

“I’ll do it.”

There was silence in the briefing room as the statement she had just made was absorbed. General Hammond was the first to recover from the shock of her announcement.

“Major Carter, I can’t permit you to do this. You’d be risking your life when we don’t even know whether Colonel O’Neill is still alive.”

“With all due respect, General, with the exception of my father, there’s no person on this planet who better understands exactly what I will be risking by becoming a host. I’m the only person in the SGC who has been through this before, and I don’t think it’s fair to ask it of anyone else.”

“That’s my point, Major. I don’t think that it’s appropriate that anyone be asked to do this – you included!” He turned to her father, who was seated next to her. “Jacob, if this is all the Tok’ra have been able to come up with, I’m disappointed. It’s practically a suicide mission!”

“Believe me, George, if we could think of another way, I’d tell you. This is the only option we could come up with.” He looked at her, “He’s right about one thing though, Sam, you’ve already risked too much. You don’t have to do this.”

She shook her head. “Dad, I’m the only one who can do this. While the experience I had with Jolinar wasn’t good, at least I’ll be mentally prepared for what happens. And if I do manage to find the Colonel, he’ll know that he can trust me. If another Tok’ra is sent, the Colonel might think it was a trap. We also don’t know what state he’ll be in – frequent use of the sarcophagus causes mental instability, as we once saw in Daniel.”

“I’m really not happy about this, Sam.”

“Dad, I don’t see that there’s a choice.”

“I know, I know, but that doesn’t mean I have to be happy about it, does it?”

She looked at her father, and while there was obvious concern in his face, because he knew exactly what a covert mission to a Goa’uld ruled planet entailed, she also could see that he would support her decision.

She turned back to General Hammond. “Sir, you know I’m the only one that can do this.”

“I’m just as unhappy about this as your father is, Major, but I understand your decision. What can we do at this end to support you?”

Before she could say anything, her father answered the question. “I’ve done some thinking about this already, George. The Tok’ra will provide a Tel’tak for travel to the planet in question. However, there’s one thing that we can’t provide - an escort.”

“Jacob Carter is correct. Any Goa’uld would have a Jaffa escort, no matter how low their rank. I will need to accompany you Major Carter.”

“I don’t think you can Teal’c,” she said. “You’re too well known among the Jaffa, but you can definitely help. Are there any Jaffa at the Alpha site that either you or Master Bra’tac trust enough to act as my escort on this mission? I’d probably only need two or three.”

“I believe that there are several that might be appropriate, but I will need to confer with Master Bra’tac. With your permission, General Hammond?”

“Of course, Teal’c.” Teal’c left the room immediately. “Is there anything else that we need to discuss?”

“There is one last point, Sir,” she answered.

“Yes, Major?”

“Since I probably should head out to the Tok’ra base with my father immediately, would it be possible for Jonas to research the planet that we will offer to Ba’al?”

“I’ll get him working on that as soon as we finish here.”

“Thank you, Sir. In that case I’ll leave immediately. The sooner we get this done, the better – for us, and for the Colonel.”

“Dismissed. And good luck Major.”

“Thank you, Sir.”

* * *

As she followed her father down the tunnels that comprised the Tok’ra base, she became increasingly nervous about the whole scenario. What if there was a problem with the blending? What if no new host could be found after the mission was completed? What if Jack was already dead? She tried to set her thoughts aside, but despite her best efforts, her concerns kept creeping back.

She and her father had left the SGC immediately following the meeting. Staying any longer would only have forced her to explain her decision, something she simply didn’t have the emotional resolve to do. She had collected a few things from her lab, and then met her father in the ‘gate room. She concentrated all her energy on preparing herself for once again becoming a host - something that was scaring her more each passing minute, no matter what her resolve about finding Jack. She was determined not to give up though. She would *never* give up on Jack.

As they walked, she realized that the base seemed very empty. Each time SG-1 had been to a Tok’ra base, there had always been a flurry of activity. This base was different. It seemed eerily still, like the base on Revanna after the Goa’uld attack. Her father was right – the Tok’ra were suffering, and they had no means of replacing their missing numbers. The death of Egeria on Pangar, even though she had been thought dead for centuries, had been another blow to their already sagging morale, and the lack of activity in this base only seemed to prove it.

After what seemed like an age, they finally reached their destination. A shiver ran down her spine. Despite the years that had passed since Jolinar, there were times when she was still unable to shake the fear that filled her memories of the incident. Although she knew that the experience with Jolinar was unusual in that they had not really shared her body, which would be different this time, it was still hard walking into the room. Only the fact that she knew she was doing this for Jack kept her going.

There was an old woman, obviously very sick, lying on what was the Tok’ra’s idea of a bed. Another woman, not much younger, stood to one side. Her father appeared to know both of them.

“How is she, Annara?”

“Her time is near, Jacob.”

Her father turned towards her slightly. “This is my daughter, Sam. She will be blended with Noren.”

“Greetings, Sam. You should converse with Noren. Unfortunately Laya, her host, is too ill to communicate.” She moved closer to the bed. “Noren?”

The eyes of the woman on the bed opened and flashed softly. “Yes, Annara?”

“I have brought Jacob and Sam. If you are willing, she will be your new host.”

The woman’s eyes slowly turned towards her.

“You are young. Are you ill?”

“No, Noren, Sam will be going on a mission, a mission that only a Tok’ra can perform. That is why she is becoming your host.”

“Do you know what it means to become a host, Sam?”

“Yes. I have been blended before, although only briefly.”

“Ah, I remember now. You were the one who was host to Jolinar.”

She nodded. “Yes, I was.”

“And why do you wish to become a host again.”

She looked at her father, and he nodded his head in assent. “A friend has been captured by Ba’al, and I need to find him. But the only way we can get close to Ba’al is to offer him information that only a Goa’uld would know. I want you to help me pretend to be a Goa’uld so I can save my friend.” She knew that, once blended, no secrets could be hidden about the feelings she harbored for her ‘friend’; but she wasn’t willing to discuss them out loud, especially in front of her father, at least not yet anyway.

“You risk much. Does your friend mean that much to you?” It seemed that Noren had seen straight to the heart of the matter.

“Yes, he does.”

“Then I will accept you as my host. Are you ready?”

Annara motioned that she should lie down on the bed. Having seen what happened when her father was blended with Selmak, she knew what to do, and lay down quickly, facing the dying host of Noren.

“Open your mouth, and bring it close to mine.”

She closed her eyes and did so, and was shocked by the sudden feel of the symbiote filling her mouth and throat, causing her to gag and then start to choke. Suddenly, pain exploded in her neck as the symbiote broke through the skin at the back of her throat, and she felt it move up around her spinal cord and into her brain. The pain intensified as she felt Noren burrowing into her brain in order to complete the blending. Lights danced in front of her eyes as she suddenly seemed pushed out of her own mind, experiencing a bizarre out of body experience where she could feel and see, yet had no control.

‘Samantha, I am Noren. Thank you for blending with me.’

Having never really conversed with Jolinar, she didn’t quite know what to do next. Fortunately, Noren had much more experience in these matters.

‘You love him, don’t you?’

‘Yes.’

‘That is why you want to go on this mission. You cannot bear to live without him.’

‘Yes.’

‘We will find him, Samantha. We will find him together.’

She heard her father speaking.

“Sam? Are you okay?”

Noren answered first. “Your daughter is well, Jacob. The blending is complete.” She felt her head dip briefly. “Everything is okay, dad. There don’t seem to be any problems. Why don’t I get back to the SGC and see whether Teal’c has managed to talk to Master Bra’tac, and you can check on the Tel’tak I’ll be using.”

* * *

When she arrived back in the ‘gate room of the SGC, she immediately felt the eyes watching her, as though they were looking for some change. While only a few key personnel had been informed of what was happening for security reasons, the news had obviously spread.

‘Do not be concerned, Samantha. Their reaction is not unusual. Just be yourself.’

The advice that Noren was able to offer as a symbiote who had been through the blending process many times was a great comfort.

She quickly headed to the briefing room where she hoped that she’d be able to find either General Hammond or Teal’c. She found them both, along with two Jaffa that Teal’c had brought back with him from the Alpha site.

“Was the blending successful, Major Carter?” Typically, Teal’c didn’t beat around the bush.

“Yes, Teal’c, it was.” She felt her head nod slightly as Noren took control. “I am Noren of the Tok’ra. I am very pleased to meet you Teal’c. Your position against the Goa’uld is well known. I am also pleased to meet you, General Hammond. Samantha has much respect for you as a leader.” If she could have blushed she would have, but thankfully Noren’s control meant that didn’t happen. “Are these the Jaffa that will be accompanying me on this mission?”

Teal’c turned slightly so that she could see the two Jaffa better. “This is Va’kar of the Gomai Foothills, and this is Do’nac of the Red Hills. Master Bra’tac would trust his life to them. And now I trust yours to them, Major Carter.”

Noren released control of her body. “Thanks, Teal’c. Va’kar, Do’nac, I am pleased to meet you. How soon can you leave?”

They exchanged looks. “We are already prepared. How will we be traveling?”

“My father is currently preparing a Tel’tac. The only thing I need to do before we depart is check in with Jonas and see what planets he found that met our criteria. With your permission, Sir?”

“Dismissed, Major.”

* * *

As she had predicted, it had only taken Jonas a few hours to track down a suitable planet from those that the SGC had explored. The planet in question had been visited by SG-2 about two years ago; and even though naquada had been found in abundance, the fact that mining would need to be started from scratch had pushed any plans for it’s development onto the back burner. It would be perfect to offer to Ba’al.

While she was walking back to the briefing room to inform General Hammond of her findings, she suddenly felt a little light-headed, and decided it might not be a bad idea to stop by the infirmary. Janet saw her as soon as she arrived.

“Hey Sam, how are you? Any problems with the, um, blending?”

“Everything seems to have gone smoothly. I did feel a little dizzy just now though, and thought it might be a good idea to stop by and have you check me out.”

“That sounds like a good idea. How long do you have?”

“Well, the sooner I can leave the better, but I have a few minutes.”

“Okay, let’s see what I can come up with.”

Janet proceeded to run the usual tests that followed an off-world mission – primarily vital signs along with some blood work. While she was waiting she decided to ask Noren about the situation.

‘An occasional spell of light-headedness is not uncommon when first blended, Samantha. They usually pass within a day or so. Several of my previous hosts experienced these symptoms after blending.’

‘Thanks, Noren. It’s comforting to know it’s not unusual.’

Janet had finished up doing her tests and came back across the room.

“There doesn’t seem to be anything unusual about your vital signs or your blood work. I’d really need to run an MRI to be certain of anything.”

“I don’t think that’s necessary, Janet. I was talking with Noren, and she said that several of her previous hosts had experienced similar symptoms, so I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about.”

“You’re sure? I’d like to do a full work up if possible.”

“I’m fine, Janet, and the less time I spend here, the sooner that we can find the Colonel.”

“Just be careful, Sam. You don’t know what you’re walking into. Take care of yourself.”

* * *

After briefing General Hammond, she had found Va’kar and Do’nac and informed them of the plan – such as it was anyway. They would be acting has her Jaffa escorts. It was convenient that both of them had formerly served Apophis, because she would be able to claim that she was a minor Goa’uld who had been on the run since Apophis’ death, and that these were her loyal bodyguards.

All three of them then traveled back through the ‘gate to the Tok’ra base, where she hoped her father had been able to prepare a ship for their use. She found him in his quarters.

“Dad?”

“Hey, Sam. Everything is ready to go. The Tel’tac is a little worn, but it has a cloaking device, and that should get you past any trouble you might encounter on the way. It also fits your position as someone who has been on the run. I’ve entered the information that you’ll need into the navigation systems, but it’s going to take about three days to get there. The planet Ba’al has chosen is a good distance from here, and there was no way of getting you any closer.”

“Thanks, Dad. I know that you did your best. We’re very grateful that you could even provide us with a ship at all, let alone the information we need on where to find Ba’al.”

“Take care, Sam. I’m sure you’ll find Jack. Just make sure that it’s both of you that are coming home!”

“I’ll be careful, Dad.” She paused for a second, considering whether she should say anything more. “You know that I have to do this, don’t you?”

“I know, but that doesn’t make me worry any less.” He came across the room and gave her a hug. “Be careful. You’re my only girl.”

* * *

Once again, he awoke to find himself being dragged through the corridors back towards his cell. As he hung between the arms of the Jaffa that were supporting him, images leapt at him from each side of his vision. He knew that they were people he recognized, but when he tried to look at them, he saw nothing. As he concentrated on the images, he felt himself being thrown to the floor; then heard the door slam as the Jaffa left. He was alone.

As he lay on the cold, hard surface, the images returned. A blonde woman featured most prominently. Her name was on his lips, but somehow escaped his conscious thoughts. He saw her carrying a gun, working in a room, eating something blue. All the images were familiar, and yet somehow distant; and the more he tried to focus, the more they faded into unreality. One image did stick in his mind, however -- that of the blonde woman drawing a knife, and driving it into his heart.

* * *

They had been traveling at hyperspeed for almost three days, pushing the Tel’tac as hard as it would go without risking overloading any systems, and they were close to their destination. Va’kar and Do’nac had pretty much kept to themselves. They had taken turns piloting the ship, but had otherwise kept their distance. Whether it was because she carried a symbiote or for some other reason, she didn’t know, but she appreciated the space. Struggling to adapt to having two minds share her body was a difficult experience.

‘The process of blending and adapting is going smoothly, Samantha.’

‘I know, Noren, but it’s still difficult. At least you’ve been through this before, and that helps.’

She was distracted from her internal conversation by Va’kar calling from the pilot’s seat. “We are approaching the co-ordinates that the Tok’ra provided, Major Carter. We will be leaving hyperspeed in just a few minutes.”

“Thank you Va’kar. Are you prepared? As we discussed, you must refer to me as Amineh until we have left this place. It is the name of a Goa’uld that once served Apophis.

“I understand. Do’nac and I will act as your loyal Jaffa servants.”

As the ship dropped out of hyperspeed, they were immediately challenged by a Ha’tak, which started moving towards them.

“Kree tal shal mak, Ba’al!”

After exchanging looks with Va’kar, Noren took control of her body and responded. “I am Amineh. I seek an audience with Lord Ba’al.”

She waited anxiously for the response. The Ha’tak continued to move towards them, and she knew that they would not last more than a few seconds should they be attacked. Finally, after what seemed like hours but was probably only around a minute, they received a response.

“You will proceed to the planet below. Do not attempt to deviate from the path you are guided through, or you will be destroyed.” As the message was transmitted, three Death Gliders were launched from the Ha’tak. One of them took a lead position, obviously intending that they should follow it, while the two others came round and then followed the Tel’tac down.

* * *

After landing on the planet’s surface, they found a large force of Jaffa had been awaiting their arrival. Suppressing the nervousness that was fluttering in her stomach, she led Va’kar and Do’nac out of the hatch.

As soon as she stepped out, she was greeted by the sound of multiple staff weapons being readied for firing. She stopped as soon as she had made enough room for the three of them to stand comfortably clear of the ship. She and Noren had already agreed that it would be best to act aggressively.

“I am Amineh. I seek an audience with Lord Ba’al.”

“Follow me”

There had been a little confusion when she had spoken first, but it was definitely the thing that a Goa’uld would have done, which started the ball rolling well.

As she had landed fairly close to the buildings that obviously made up Ba’al’s current place of residence, the walk was not far. They were led into the largest of the structures, and led down a corridor that was typically Goa’uld in design – both ostentatious and yet somehow bare at the same time.

They were led to a small room, at which point one of the Jaffa turned and told them to wait. “Lord Ba’al will see you when he is ready. Do not attempt to leave this room.”

In the end, they were kept waiting for almost two hours. System Lords were always eager to show their superiority over other Goa’uld. While she was able to converse with Noren to pass the time, she couldn’t help but wonder what Ba’al might be doing that was taking so long, and hoped it was nothing to do with Jack. Eventually, the same Jaffa came and let them to what was obviously an audience chamber.

The man who was obviously Ba’al was standing on a dias facing away from them. He seemed to be of average height, and was not dressed as gaudily as many Goa’uld, but then he turned towards her, and she was hit by his obvious physical presence. It wasn’t uncommon for a Goa’uld to choose an attractive host, although she couldn’t personally remember finding any System Lords attractive; but that was not the case with this man, and when he spoke, she had a hard time not being transfixed.

“I am Ba’al. Why are you here, and how did you find me?”

His voice was deep, seductive even. Fortunately, as Noren was controlling her body, none of her feelings entered into the equation.

“I am Amineh. I was once in the service of Apophis. I now wish to serve you.”

“Why should I be interested in the likes of you? There are many more powerful who would serve me. What can you offer? You arrive in a Tel’tac with only two Jaffa. This is not power.”

“No, but I do have something that no other can offer – the location of a planet rich in naquada, a planet which is unknown to any System Lord.”

His eyes flashed his obvious interest. Many planets that had once been rich in naquada had been mined dry, and naquada was the key element for all Goa’uld technology.

“And why should I believe you?”

“Many flee the onslaught of Anubis. I do not wish to be a mere pawn. I do not believe that Anubis will win this conflict, and I want to make sure that I am well positioned when that happens. I have few forces to command. All I have to offer is information.”

“What is to stop me torturing that information from you, and taking what would then be rightfully mine?”

“I have more available than just this, but I have it hidden away in a secure location. Without me, you will not get it.”

“I will have to investigate this claim to determine its truth.”

“Agreed. I will provide you with the co-ordinates, and will remain here until you have completed a survey.”

Ba’al turned to one of the Jaffa. “See that she is attended to, but she is not to leave her accommodations.”

* * *

He lay on the floor of the prison cell. Time no longer held any meaning for him, and he could not remember the number of times that he had been dragged before Ba’al – although it did seem to be more frequently of late. As he lay there he heard the door of the cell open. Dreading the arrival of another Jaffa to drag him away, he threw his hand across his face.

He simply lay in the cell, waiting for the Jaffa to drag him away. He knew that any sort of resistance was useless – he simply didn’t have the strength. While his mind screamed at the thought of another session of torture, he would never show any sign of weakness to an enemy.

Strangely, there was no sound of heavy boots, and no hands grabbing him under the arms. He risked a look at the doorway, and was surprised by the blonde haired figure standing there.

“Carter?”

She stepped into the cell, and as she did so he could see that she was carrying an M45 Colt Pistol. She was pointing it at him.

“Carter? What are you doing?”

She said nothing, but deliberately settled into a firing stance and aimed the gun at his chest. He shuffled away slightly, backing towards the wall of the cell.

“Let’s just take it easy. There’s no reason for anyone to get hurt.”

He eased a little further away, trying to get a little room to move, but found himself up against the wall of the cell. He was starting to panic a little as the woman, the woman he loved, hadn’t moved.

“It’s me, Jack. You don’t want to shoot me, do you?”

Still no response. He could feel the sweat beading on his brow.

“Put the gun down. Please! Let’s talk this out.”

He could see that she was tightening her finger on the trigger. His panic increased tenfold as he knew that there was nowhere for him to escape.

“Carter, no! Don’t shoot! NO!”

The gun went off with a roar in the confined space of the cell. He felt the bullet punch into his chest, and he collapsed against to the floor screaming, and holding his hand over the wound. As he lay there dying, he saw her smiling at him, and then she slowly turned her back and shut the cell door.

When he awoke, he noticed that he was no longer bleeding. Had Ba’al revived him? He was still against the wall of the cell. What was happening? His chest still ached from the shot, but there was no blood on his torn shirt. As he speculated on why Carter had shot him, he slowly collapsed into the darkness that once again pulled him away from the slim lifeline to reality.

* * *

It was almost two long days before she was told that Ba’al would see her again. During that time they were confined to the set of rooms that she had been allocated. There had been plentiful food, and the accommodations were luxurious; but what had bothered her was that she was so close to Jack, and yet so far away. Her sleep was filled with dreams of what could be happening to him, and even though Noren was able to keep her mind occupied when she was awake, she knew that the longer she took, the less her chances of rescuing him.

What also bothered her was that she had not been feeling well. It wasn’t anything serious, just a slight stomach upset, but she was very surprised. Shouldn’t Noren be preventing her from getting a stomach upset?

Her thoughts were interrupted by Noren. ‘You have noticed it also?’

‘Yes. For a day now.’

‘I fear that the blending may not be as complete as I expected, Samantha.’

‘What does that mean?’

‘Your body is rejecting me. It will not be long before I will need to find a new host, or risk dying.’

‘How can that be? I thought you said that everything had gone smoothly?’

‘I do not know, but I have never before been blended with someone who had previously been a host – let alone having symbiotes twice die within them. I suspect that is related to the problem.’

‘How long can you remain blended?’

‘Hopefully for several more days, but it depends on how quickly your body rejects me.’

Any further discussion of the issue had to be shelved as one of Ba’al’s Jaffa entered the room. “Lord Ba’al will see you now.”

Upon entering Ba’al’s audience chamber, she could immediately see that he was in good humour.

“Amineh, your information has proved accurate. The planet is rich in naquada as you indicated. What do you ask in return for this information?”

“Only for your protection Lord Ba’al, and to be able to serve you as I once served Apophis.”

“In what capacity did you serve Apophis?”

“I administered small mining operations.”

“Then you shall perform the same role for me on this planet. You will have two days in which to gather resources before you will leave. I will instruct you at that time on what your quota will be.”

“Yes, Lord.”

Ba’al turned and spoke to his First Prime. “See that Amineh is given the assistance she requires, and that she be ready to depart two days from now.”

“Yes, Lord Ba’al.”

At most two days. That was all the time she had to find Jack. In fact, it was probably less, because otherwise she would be forced to prepare labourers and equipment for departure. She would have to rely on Va’kar and Do’nac to find him, and find him quickly.

* * *

It took only a few hours before she had some positive news. There was a building to which Va’kar had been denied access, and he had seen other prisoners being taken there. This seemed like the best shot, even though she did not know for certain that Jack was alive, and would not be able to check. Trusting the gut feeling she had that he could not be dead without her knowing, she planned a mission for a few hours time, when it would be night.

Finding the building was simple; gaining access was harder, even though she was masquerading as a Goa’uld.

“I am Amineh. You will grant me access to this building. I wish to determine if any prisoners have the experience I require.”

“Lord Ba’al has said that nobody is to be allowed access.”

“If you do not move, I will kill you where you stand, and then discuss the matter with Lord Ba’al later. Out of my way!”

Fortunately, the Jaffa instinct to obey their gods meant that she did not have to carry out her threat, and she was granted access. “I will discuss your insolence with Lord Ba’al.”

The corridor she entered was dim and quiet, unnaturally so. She suspected that sound dampening devices had been installed to form part of the prisoner’s torture. The layout was simple – cell doors were spaced at intervals, and it appeared as though there were no additional corridors or levels. Apparently Ba’al did not keep many prisoners. A shiver ran down her spine at the thought. Jack had to be alive though.

She looked into each cell as she walked, peering in to see who was inside. Most were empty, but a few contained people that cringed away from the window when they saw her. Finally, she came to a cell that seemed no different from any others. The difference was that Jack was in that cell. Her heart leapt as he was obviously still alive, but concern immediately filled her as she realized he lay still, not moving but for the subtle rise and fall of his chest. She opened the door, and for the first time in many days, spoke with her own voice.

“Colonel?”

No response.

“Sir?”

Still nothing.

“Jack, it’s me. It’s Sam.”

He just lay there, oblivious to what she was saying. His eyes were open, but stared straight through her. What had Ba’al done to him? He seemed to have no physical injuries, although his clothes were filled with rips and holes, exposing the skin beneath. So many holes! Ba’al had obviously been following the same practice as before – torturing Jack to death and then reviving him. She knew that a person could only take so much of being in a sarcophagus, and perhaps Jack had not fully recovered mentally from his last encounter with Ba’al. She shuddered. She needed to get him to move before they were discovered.

“Jack!”

His eyes moved, barely, but it was movement.

“Jack!”

He mumbled something, but as she leaned in closer to try and hear him, a sudden pain filled her stomach, driving into her like nothing she had ever experienced, and suddenly making her nauseated.

‘The time is very near, Samantha. I must leave your body, or die.’

Before she could formulate a response, another searing pain filled her, and she collapsed onto the floor, finding herself lying next to Jack.

As pain washed over her in ever increasing waves, she heard a shout from the corridor outside, and then the sound of a Zat’nik’tel. They had been discovered, and she was powerless to act. She reached out to touch his face, looking deep into his unresponsive eyes, knowing that this might be the last time she was able to do so.

“I love you, Jack.”

She only wished that he could hear her.


 

~end~

Thanks for reading.  I’m always looking for ways to improve my writing.  Please let me know what you think!

Copyright © 2003 Robert Holland - rob@chiroho.net